You ever wake up from a dream laughing? It wasn't "absurd," or anything... just really funny... if I had a video camera for my head, it would have been one of those moments I would like to preserve and watch again... it was sitcom quality shit.

tired

I am soooooo tired (yeah, I know I said the same thing the other night)... it happens, but damn. I get too busy, sometimes. If I could, I would sleep all day (that sounds like such a great idea)... but Ma's in town. I couldn't spend time with her tonight because I had to be out of town, but I need to hang out with her before she heads back home... so I won't get to sleep as much as I'd like to... or likely need to. So... maybe I should sleep while I can, instead of sitting here talking about how beat I am. Here's to... better dreams, for a change?

Better dreams, indeed. :)

I like rain... but I like my rain with "BOOM," not this Seattle, Ohio dreary drizzle shit... it's just annoying. It just makes me sleepy... and I love sleep... but when you have so much to do and you'd rather just be asleep, it makes for a big bowl of suck.

tired

I'm so tired... but I can't sleep. I just lay here, toss and turn, back and forth. I am comfortable (for a change)... but I can't find it... I am too alive with thought.

If I could only bring myself to read the emails, again...

So, I was hanging with one of my best friends before meeting up with Ma, who's in town for a day, for dinner... I was telling him about the hobag that used to "live" downstairs and her baby getting hepatitis and all that... So he proceeds to tell me about how one of our friends, "John Doe," was recently diagnosed with hepatitis, as well... and, in turn, gave it to his wife. He says that he got it from snorting pills.

"What?!?! Bullshit! Hepatitis isn't in boogers - oh... wait... I'd never really considered it, but... duh..."

Yep. It's true... or at least the only likely possibility. See, "John" is a bit of a community pillar... a great job... no promiscuity, no IV drugs... ever... no blood transfusions, no blood "accidents." Loves his wife, dearly... a really good guy, through and through... but "John" had injured himself some years ago and became addicted to prescription pain medicine. Now, meet "Dave Douchebag." "Dave" is not so much of a pillar... six jobs in five years - quit or was fired from them, all. "Dave" has a pretty public drug problem and has for a long time, since we were kids, basically. So "Dave" gets hepatitis from... whatthefuckever he did to get it... who knows, y'know? "Dave" and "John" have been friends forever, too, and they would occasionally get together and crush 'em up... but see, "Dave" has a bunch of little, bleeding holes in his schnoz... it's not like he walks around town bleeding profusely from these lesions, or anything like that... he's just done a lot of shit that has done bad things to his nose... a little teency, weency, tiny, nearly-microscopic speck of blood in the tiniest plop of mucus from "Dave" gets in/on the straw, he shares it with "John" (over the course of... a long time) and... BOOM, welcome to the world of hepatitis. I was thinking that "John" would need to have said lesions, as well, which he may or may not have... I was curious so we Googled it. After sorting through some of the garbage/scare tactic/propaganda and finding actual medical evidence, it turns out the "recipient" doesn't even need to have any "nasal issues," because hepatitis can be absorbed through the nasal membrane, directly. I'm sure the chances are a bit slimmer than those who have, say, shared needles (or even equipment during said bang), but still, it's there and it happens... apparently with some frequency, even. Hepatitis C can live in the air and on surfaces for over 16 hours... There's really no need to go into how "John" gave it to his wife, is there? It was discovered through a routine blood-screening. Needless to say, "John" is not happy... but he doesn't blame "Dave," douchebag or not. I mean, there's no real way to no for sure. He just knows he has something that's likely going to fuck his life-span... in a very real way.

It turns out that HIV can be transmitted in the same way (as any other blood-borne pathogen)... however rarely... HIV doesn't live remotely as long outside a human host. It has a real problem with this whole "air" thing. "John" is HIV negative.

I'm a little irritated by it... that I had never considered the possibilities of something like that. I mean, in all the weirdness I have seen in my life, all of the stuff I've seen happen to people through "sheer stupidity," I'd never even thought of something like that as a means of contracting diseases like that... a cold, maybe, but... but after reading about it ("knowledge is power, yo"), it's like, "Damn... Damn, indeed.". It's just so weird, y'know? Why do bad things have to happen to good people, while bad people get a lucky pass, so often?

I hate to hear it, "John Doe." I hope science figures out a way for you to rid yourself of it.
: \

so...

So the drug dealer/pimp that got evicted downstairs got popped (his old lady got hooked up, too)... finally. Seems he had been "hiding out" with some other fine, upstanding local citizens, who joined him in his arrest... made a bad move, got desperate, and sold to the wrong people... like the typical low-class, amoral dumbass. The buyer got popped and sung their little heart out, opening up a big can of worms that's gonna end up with several more wankers before it's all over. I read the police report and it was sadly humorous how stupid these people were.

That was the "good news," I guess.

The bad news... the crusty nineteen year-old hooker tramp that he was telling people was his "daughter," arrested twice since the eviction. They got some blood from her - hepatitis (imagine that), of the "luggage" (C) variety... and apparently the little baby of hers has it, too... and is showing signs of liver failure... already. So unless the baby was sharing mom's toothbrush (oh yeah, it happens that way more than you'd think) or was stupid enough to leave a needle out for baby girl to play with while momma ho got the nods... she was born with it... which means momma ho probably didn't know she had it, either. I mean, a vast percentage of people with it don't know they have it for a long time... and in the meantime, they do things like bring kids into the world that are born with it and pretty much screw them (not to mention themselves) out of a chance at a decent life.

It makes me angry (on a few levels)... and it makes me sad (on a few other levels)... a little small-town microcosm of the real world kicking you in the gut.

I about fell out of my chair when I saw this... but you would've had to have been there, I guess.

...I'd sell my soul,
my self-esteem a dollar at a time
for one chance, one kiss,
one taste of you, my Magdalena...

devil

Knocking on my door was an Evil Silhouette
Knocking this morning, a black Silhouette
Knocking on my door was an Evil Silhouette
and their eyes were glowing like two lit cigarettes...