4:00am
Sleepless... laying in bed...
wondering...

Pedaling through
the dark currents,
I find
an accurate copy,
A blueprint
of the pleasure
in me

Swirling black lilies totally ripe
A secret code carved...

"Free," somebody says
Guess now I'm free
to say what I feel,
crush you with words
Tell you you're wrong
for all that you've done
The harder we fall,
the less we all learn...

Praise keeps you so tall
I give you some time,
you wasted it all
fighting for space,
looking for ways
to spread yourself thin
The more I stay here,
the less you fit in...

Now hang on and listen,
you broken record
No I won't stay long, so
keep it all to yourself

And when the conflict ends,
the life of us depends
on whether time can clear our way...

I made this... to remind myself of how much of a complete and utter fuck I am...

Is there something that you're trying to say?
Don't hold back, now
It's been a long time since I felt this way
so don't hold back, now
I've purposely forgot about
loving anyone
'Cause I'm "the only one who has,
who has been stepped upon."
Is there something that you're trying to say?
'Cause I can take it
'Cause I grew up a man this way
If I'm hurt I'll shake it
I'll crawl back into my cave
That's how I'll make it
'Cause out of all this hurt we have
beauty thus become

In the mourning I can see the sights
No wonder I could never keep you satisfied
In the mourning I can see inside
myself and all the things that you were trying to hide.